The Great Wait...

Something I have been struggling with lately can be especially hard to figure out because I know it is a God-given struggle. When it comes to guy/girl relationships, I will be the first to explain why we are the way we are. God made women with a desire to be loved, cared for, and protected by a man. We want to be able to rest in the arms of an earthly man who loves us and tells us we are beautiful. If the family always worked the way God created it to, it would be much easier to have this need met. We girls would be loved and protected by our daddies until Prince Charming rode in, received our dad's blessing, and took over the role of that man in our lives. In the process, a picture is created of submission and Christ's love for His bride. However, humans have horribly distorted this picture. These days, it feels like it is somewhat of a rarity to find a young girl who is able to be in her daddy's arms until she marries. I cannot imagine the sorrow our King feels when he sees the picture of His relationship with His bride totally destroyed. Instead of families, we have single parenting. Instead of daddy-daughter love and protection, we have girls running into the arms of any man who shows them attention. So many girls are being robbed of the time in daddy's arms. Instead, they are left with a burning desire in their hearts to have the love and protection of a man in their life. Being a child of divorce, these struggles are my struggles. Even though I can give lectures on why I feel the way I do, it doesn't lessen the pain. Thankfully, my relationship with Christ has kept me from running into the arms of the wrong men. God kept me from this even before I had a relationship with him that ruled my life. Another blessing is the fact that God has given me the gift of a restored relationship with my dad. We lost about 11 years of having a strong relationship, but God is the true Healer! Yet, I will again say that the pain is not gone. My dad lives 10 hours away and I have not been able to have what every girl was designed to have. Some days, it is unbearably hard to see so many girls around me resting in the arms of an earthly guy. I think of the comfort and protection they must feel and I long for what they have. I get lonely. I want to know that somebody thinks I'm beautiful or simply that I am good enough for somebody...a man. I feel like I fight daily for my heart, but see the ones giving themselves away being the ones who are rewarded. Thankfully, by the grace of God, I am always able to come back to the Truth. I know that these girls are lacking the only thing that will truly fulfill them. I know that I have the joy and peace of still owning some of the most valuable treasures God has given me--my heart and my purity. When I say purity, I don't just mean physical purity, although that is a very, very valuable treasure. I am also talking about the purity of my heart. Women are much more emotional beings than men are. Every time a woman gets into a deep relationship with a guy, it is like gluing cardboard to cardboard. When they are ripped apart, fibers of each one is left stuck to the other. So many girls think that they can give their heart away but take it back once they want to give it to another man. This is so untrue and so heartbreaking to watch. Someday, I want to stand at the alter with a man who is getting every fiber of my heart. I want him to be the worthy knight who won my heart and now has that entire treasure to himself. Sometimes, guarding my heart feels like missing out on so much: security, "love," assurance, etc. Yet, I am constantly reminded of the great blessing that awaits me and all girls who are willing to save all of themselves for that worthy man. Yes, the wait is painful sometimes. But someday, the reward will far outweigh the pain of waiting. Plus, in the meantime, I will save myself from much heartbreak and distraction. Avoiding a constant stream of temporary dating relationships gives me a chance to depend fully on God to meet every emotional need. It also removes quite a bit of mystery. I don't have to worry about if "he's the one." Instead, I know he isn't the one unless God clearly leads me into a relationship with him. Ah, what an honor and blessing it is to have the King of Kings as the author of my love story. Such great adventures await me!